Sunday, September 11, 2005
A Note From My Heart......
This morning in church, I was reminded of how much I have that others may not have, of what I can give that others may not have to give. I saw posessions as things, and memories as pictures of those things. I saw moments in my life that I would not trade and moments I'd give anything to forget or take back. I saw lives around me touched by the hand of disaster. I saw fear, hunger, longing, love and even hope and perserverance.
I heard the little girl sitting (well, standing in the chair) next to me, singing the song from the overhead projector with a boisterous voice and you could tell she know the song and apparently thought that it was a good one! (which it was)
I saw my son sitting next to me in a church were we went once to hear Jared Manning sing and I saw my son standing in the pew playing his imaginary guitar and singing at the top of his lungs a song he did not know but was singing anyway. (Count Your Blessings (sung by The Martins, ;click on the link to hear part of the song).
I am sometimes upset that things like this can't happen in the privacy of my own home, times when I foolishly try to hide the tears, (you know the type, wipe one eye quickly....oops, there goes the other one......ok, no wait, here goes the first one again.....). It has been a while since I really had a good cry. I think to myself that I've become hardened to the pain it causes when I think about it but when I am still and quite, God whispers to me, "Colleen, it is ok to cry, I am crying with you. I know you are hurting, I know you miss him terribly, I know that your heart is breaking, go ahead, cry!"
I want to but what good does it do? It smears my makeup, uses kleenex, and doesn't change anything. Ian is still gone.
All this to say that a young girl singing, reminded me of Ian.
Count Your Blessings.
Colleen
I heard the little girl sitting (well, standing in the chair) next to me, singing the song from the overhead projector with a boisterous voice and you could tell she know the song and apparently thought that it was a good one! (which it was)
I saw my son sitting next to me in a church were we went once to hear Jared Manning sing and I saw my son standing in the pew playing his imaginary guitar and singing at the top of his lungs a song he did not know but was singing anyway. (Count Your Blessings (sung by The Martins, ;click on the link to hear part of the song).
I am sometimes upset that things like this can't happen in the privacy of my own home, times when I foolishly try to hide the tears, (you know the type, wipe one eye quickly....oops, there goes the other one......ok, no wait, here goes the first one again.....). It has been a while since I really had a good cry. I think to myself that I've become hardened to the pain it causes when I think about it but when I am still and quite, God whispers to me, "Colleen, it is ok to cry, I am crying with you. I know you are hurting, I know you miss him terribly, I know that your heart is breaking, go ahead, cry!"
I want to but what good does it do? It smears my makeup, uses kleenex, and doesn't change anything. Ian is still gone.
All this to say that a young girl singing, reminded me of Ian.
Count Your Blessings.
Colleen
Comments:
GREAT blog!!! I love your honesty..
and in case NO one has ever told you IT IS OK TO CRY!!!!
I know GOD is with you, every step of the way.......
GOD BLESS, HEAL and CONSOLE YOU!!!
I WILL lift up my eyes to the hills [around Jerusalem, to sacred Mount Zion and Mount Moriah]--From whence shall my help come?(A)
My help comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth.
He will not allow your foot to slip or to be moved; He Who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, He who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand [the side not carrying a shield].
The sun shall not smite you by day, nor the moon by night.
Psalm 112:1-6
:)
P
and in case NO one has ever told you IT IS OK TO CRY!!!!
I know GOD is with you, every step of the way.......
GOD BLESS, HEAL and CONSOLE YOU!!!
I WILL lift up my eyes to the hills [around Jerusalem, to sacred Mount Zion and Mount Moriah]--From whence shall my help come?(A)
My help comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth.
He will not allow your foot to slip or to be moved; He Who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, He who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand [the side not carrying a shield].
The sun shall not smite you by day, nor the moon by night.
Psalm 112:1-6
:)
P
I finally found the link and put it on there, it is the same name as the one you sent me on the msm, but it is different. click on the link and listen to a small part of it. I highly recomment this cd. You'd love it! Dream Big is the name of the cd and it is by The Martins. Blessings.
About Me
- Name: praynlady
- Location: West Columbia, TEXAS, United States
I am a prayer warrior. I am the wife of ONE TERRIFIC MAN, the mother of 3 beautiful children, 2 daughters here on earth and one son who lives with Jesus. I am here to help and to serve any way I can. I WANT TO LIVE, LAUGH AND LOVE LIKE I WAS DYING!!
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