Saturday, September 27, 2008
It's Been 26 LONG Years
Last night, many of my classmates from the class of CHS 1982, met at the Homecoming game for West Columbia, (along with 3 other reunion class gatherings...including my sister Edie's class....Edith, Keith Brown sends you best wishes and a prayer that you'll make the next reunion!!!)
We had an awesome time and though they put up an amazing fight (for the Roughnecks), they lost 21/19 to a team from El Campo, and I'll tell you that this team was ranked #8 in the State of Texas. They beat us only by 3 points. And actually due to an error on the EC team, we might have tied the game but they ran off the field as if the game were already over and we lost the time on the clock so we were unable to kick our field goal.
Anyway, we had a great time and even though I could not remember anybody but my best friend Tim, it was so much fun to laugh at the fact that NO ONE remembered anybodies names and we were praying for name tags! haha
We were all wondering (for any of you out there that have already been there) if you have this much trouble at the 50 yr reunion.......haha
We decided for the 31 yr, we'd do picture name tags! haha hang them on lanyards and just wear them to every reunion! haha
Well, today, actually this morning, as I scramble around my house, frantically searching for the EXACT outfit to wear, I settle on a pair of capris and a pink t-shirt that will set off my beautiful purple jewelry set! I hope! haha All the while, trying to decide what I'll wear tonight at the main dinner! haha Yep, it's all about what I DON'T have to wear in my closet! heehee
So, I'm off to the land of OZ to meet more of my classmates and pull my foot out of my mouth many times, simply because I don't care what anyone thinks, as long as I can figure out who they are and try my darnedest to remember it. It's not just that I don't remember but then about 10 minutes later, I have to ask someone again cuz I've already forgotten which of the fancy haired ladies is which! heehee
So, to any and all who are celebrating their reunions this weekend! TRUDGE ON MY FRIENDS!!!! TRUDGE ON!
(ps...if you are wondering why we are celebrating our 26th yr reunion...it's because our class officers were no where to be found and/or wanted nothing to do with the planning phases of a reunion, and we missed a year because of that....we then came up with a "committee" to do the work....and we did a great job if I say so myself....now let's see if any of the officers show up!)( oh so we kept it this way because we did a 21 yr since we missed the 20th~! Now it's just funny so we keep it going!)
Thursday, September 11, 2008
My prayerful thoughts for today as we pack and leave behind all that we hold dear
I had my knee surgery yesterday and the after effects are that I am in pain and I am no help to anyone! Johnny and Mary have been helping so much by getting every thing all loaded and into the camper for Paul to help us out.
I am not an organizer so it is crazy chaos trying to figure out what needs to go and what needs to stay.
I aj totally freaked out because I can't control where my thoughts are going and the pain meds are not helping. As I write this, Paul and Kendra are asleep, Johnny, Mary, Faith and Kaylee left about 7 am and are on the road. We will not catch up but we are hoping to leave before lunch and traffic seems to start standing still. I have no plans to sit in the road with bumper to bumper traffic while trying to get the heck out of dodge.
Over the las few days, Ike has moved up the Texas coast line progressivley and Johnny's theory is that it will continue doing so until it's back over the Louisiana line.
Hurricanes make me want to ask God, what were you thinking? I mean termites? Wood peckers? Hurricanes?
I have enough to deal with on a normal (abnormal) day to day basis and now this.....
Please pray for all of us down on the coast and especially for those who have to leave and have no money to do so. Pray for those of us traveling on the highways and biways with no idea what to expect upon return.
Here is my prayer for today:
Father God, thank you for my family. Thank you for my health and the health of my family, thank you for the blessings you give me each and every day when I see Kaylee smile, or Kordell giggling or being mischevious, and Reigan laughing.
I ask that you watch over them/us all and place your arms around us for protection as we leave all of our lives behind us and head away from this storm. I pray that you watch over my friends and all family that are unable to leave for one reason or another and I pray that you give us peace as we drive away from our homes that hold so many things dear to us.
Father God, I ask you to comfort me and allow me to be able to travel with my knee, with as little discomfort as possible. Father, I pray that you will guide us as we begin our trip, take care of our homes, and Father, the selfish side of me wants to stay and hold on to everything because the memories are just not enough for me. Ian is in my heart but his things are in my home and I am afraid to leave them. This month is hard enough as it is and I am not sure that I can handle much more.
Father God, give me strength to handle all of this, peace of mind to let happen whatever needs to happen, and the courage to accept whatever comes!
Father, today, as we all begin the trek westward, northward and eastward, help us to have control, and to be courteous, and caring and mindful of others also having a tough time. Ease Paul's mind and let him have enough rest to make this trip without worrying to much!
Thank you Father for you love, for your son who died for me, and for constantly reminding me of the amazing love you have for your children. The sun is shining and I'm happy to be alive.
Guide us, protect us and keep us strong enough to handle what has yet to come!
Father, I humbly pray that you will destroy this storm before it destroys lives. I know that miracles do happen and I'm prepared to see one this week.
Monday, September 01, 2008
(Please take a moment to pray for those who've had to bury a child way before the normal sequence of life has been fulfilled, tragically, slowly, through war, accidents, disease, etc. ..Pray for those who are friends to them and do not yet understand the bitter feelings of loss and grief.)
When my son died, he, Ian was wearing a seatbelt. It did not save his life. They are designed to HELP save lives. They are not a guarantee. They have to be worn properly and fitted and most of us do not do this. Ian was laying down with the seat reclined...he slid right out of it!
One of the precious gifts that was given to me when Ian died, was the gift that gave me the ability to understand, to really open my heart and "hear", a way to talk, grieve, counsel and communicate with others who are grieving over a child who's sudden death has changed everything forever.
It's not fair and it's not in the right order and we have to learn to accept, and keep going. (for example:)
When Ian had been gone for about 8 months and we were cleaning out his room of some of the things that were special, we came across a train set and we asked the giver of this set if he wanted it back. He said no, so we asked my father (a train collecter) if he would care to have it and after hanging up on me several times, I could not understand what the problem was.
Months later, my father told me what was happening in his mind;
he said, "A grandfather should leave things to his grandchild, not a grandchild leaving things to his grandfather".
This broke my heart but it taught me something else about the timing and the sense of devastation at all levels of the family. There is a normal order of things and when a child passes, it is not normal and therefore much harder to accept.
Those are the two hardest parts...
Accepting and Keep Going
...accepting that you won't be setting a place on the dinner table, or buying the same number of tickets at the football game or seeing a graduation you looked forward to all your life or having a daughter in law, or grandbabies...
...accept....keep going....there are so many others that are counting on the parents strength, especially if there are other siblings to ____....
...accept...they will never again call you to pick them up from a friends house, or ask to borrow the keys, or .....
...accept...that every night when you walk past their bedroom, you will have to look inside just for comfort, you will smell their clothes, you will cry, you will hurt, you will grieve...
...accept....that you will go to visit them every chance you can at the cemetary for many months, years even...
...to keep going, simply means that you have to keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep going FORWARD...
...as painful as it seems, it will take you out of the depression and denial of a loved one we've had to bury...
...to keep going...means that you have to learn to live with the pain and cherish the memories, the love and the life that once was....
...to keep going...you have to believe you will see the person/child/friend/parent again in heaven...God has promised us that...
...To keep going....you have to let the person go and live the life that you still have in front of you to the very best of your ability...
...to keep going and accept what has happened is not easy but necessary...
...to keep going and to accept a loss of this magnitude will linger in your heart forever in the hole that was left behind....
We can and do and will survive.....
I know this may not help any, but I would ask that you share it with any family so that they can/will have hope...
...hope that tomorrow they can actually breath, that they can eat and not feel guilty, that they can smile and know that their child is watching everything they do...
...to wake on a new day and know that all things are in the right place and time according to God's will.
It's not fair but it is God's will and accepting that HE does not make bad things happen but he does allow them to happen is hard as well. (I have a very long story that goes with that sentence but I'll spare you
Their child will long be remembered by all of his/her friends and all of his/her family and those memories will live forever in your hearts.
That is an awesome legacy for someone whom we've had to let go of.
On that note, please tell the family this for me:
"My son died, but he is not lost! I know exactly where he is!" He lives with Christ at a new address but he is NOT LOST~
~ I DID NOT LOSE HIM, HE FOUND GOD~
I know losing a friend can be devastating but just to be prayerful for the time that will come for the family in about 4 weeks when everyone goes back to work, or back to "their" normal, this family will not have a "normal" for a year or so.
Wow, I didn't know I had that much to say but there is still more so I'm off of here before I write a book on grief!
©Colleen Cooper 9-01-08
Follow this link to an incredible song that is about the grief process after loosing someone you love. It's an incredible song by Mercy Me called "Homesick"...I hope you will hear the message in the song!